The Love Series Season 2 (Day 9)
Question: You have alluded to forgiveness a couple of times in your love series. I have someone who claims to love me but he does not stop hurting me. He apologizes every time but he doesn’t stop, he does it again and again and again. Do I keep forgiving?
Like I said yesterday, for this question again, I apologise to you. I am sorry that you had to go through this. I am sorry that you have somebody in your life who has taken advantage of you, hurt you and is taking it for granted.
Firstly, I want you to know that to be able to answer this question, I need more details. It is kind of vague! What kind of offence? What is he doing to you? Did you cause it? Is there something you did to cause it? I really need to ask more questions to know how to answer you. So, please reach me directly and explain a little more about what it is you are going to through.
That said, to answer on a general note, I want you to please forgive all that he has done. Please forgive him. Like I said earlier, forgiveness is really for you not for the other person. Forgive him for all he has ever done, no matter how often he has done it. BUT you don’t have to indulge that relationship again especially if the damage he is doing is a very serious thing!!!
Again like I said, until I know details I can not give definite answers but if what he’s doing is really, really dangerous to you, forgive him but get out of the relationship. You don’t have to stay in that relationship.
I want you to know that forgiveness reaches its highest potential when you can let go of the hurt. Even if you quit the relationship and stay away from him, please ensure you have good closure i.e. don’t burn the bridge. Make sure you talk about it, end the relationship – ‘I forgive you, I let you go, I am not holding it against you but I cannot continue this!’ – so that when you see him in the future, you can still wave and say hi without your heart beating fast, without anger or upset. Don’t burn the bridge, have good closure but let it go.
Now that you have let it go, now that I believe you are making a decision to forgive and end the relationship because it is not helpful to you, I want to ask you to take time to heal, be on your own for a while.
I have noticed that many females, after leaving one relationship, they are jumping to the other one, they just really do not know how to stay on their own, which is sad. Take time to be alone. Heal from this hurt. Find yourself again. Grow yourself again. Build yourself again emotionally, spiritually and physically. Take time to be with yourself. Heal. Find yourself again. Laugh again. Meet new people. Live life to the fullest.
So I am saying leave that relationship and take time to be the best version of you that you can be before you start thinking of being in a romantic relationship again. I hope this answered your question. I hope it was a blessing to you.
For more questions and counseling, please send me a DM on Instagram @timiadigun or a message on WhatsApp on 07034721385.
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I love you. I am rooting for you and I believe the best about you!
Please, Keep Living and Keep Loving!!!