The Love Series (Day 21): Question 6

A very Happy Sunday to you. Today is a day of rest. Please ensure you rest and spend ample time with your friends and family. Let’s take just one question today.

What can you say about love at first sight, is it even possible? Please sir, answer using your own experience as a case study.

Doctor Love:
I am sure many readers have been hoping somebody would ask this question. Thankfully, someone has.
If you have been following this series from Day 1, I think you would agree with me that there is NO LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT. There can be ATTRACTION or ADMIRATION or FONDNESS at first sight but not love. Love is not something you feel at an instant. Love forms; it grows.
Even if you want to use the example of a mother loving her child at first sight (after delivery), that too wouldn’t be accurate because she had started loving that child right from when she carried the child in her womb.
I remember the first “acknowledged” contact I had with my wife. I needed to drop something in her church in Lagos and I met her at the door. I knew her face was familiar from OAU, Ile-Ife but we had never spoken prior. I took her number that day, I think I still have the diary where I wrote her telephone digits.
I assumed her name was Ife. So, I wrote the number against Ife (I didn’t know she would eventaully be “my Ife”, that is, my love). Did I fall in love with her first sight? No! But was I attracted to her awesome personality? Yes. It must have been months after before we ever spoke again and when we started communicating, one thing led to the other and we are here today.


Love grows. Love doesn’t jump on us. Like I said when we discussed “Love Comes Softly”, if the guy/girl is all over you in 1 or 2 days of meeting you, please tell them to calm down. ‘Love’ that comes in a rush or in a moment is no love. It would die just as fast.
Love grows, filling our hearts and permeating our souls as we interact more with that loved one. So, please don’t get carried away when he tells you I loved you the first time I set my eyes on you. You CANNOT LOVE WHAT YOU DON’T KNOW. Please quote me. You need to know the person for love to form and grow.
What he felt was attraction or admiration. Love is too powerful a word to be used that way. That’s the reason for many broken relationships and marriages and “unwanted” pregnancies. People that never loved each other thought what they felt for each other was love. I believe you understand my stand.

I’ll be back tomorrow. Until then, please KEEP LIVING and KEEP LOVING.

I love you!
Timi Adigun.

14 thoughts on “The Love Series (Day 21): Question 6

  1. TeeMee

    Whoever asked this question, I love you.
    so it is ATTRACTION under the guise of “I love you”…hmmm,the picture is clear now
    Doc,it’s been a great job all along.Welldone Sir


  2. Oluwaseun

    Thumbs up DOC! well said. I used to think sometimes it’s pride on my side or the fact that ain’t bold enough even when I’m sure I am. You just rejuvenated my patience and hopes…after all nothing is wrong with me,it’s just that I haven’t had that “acknowledged” contact with my own “Ife”. Lemme go dust my diary too,she might just be around the corner.

    Thanks Dad for sharing this. More grace.


  3. Oluwaseun

    Great one sir … we can’t love at first sight ,rather we love through knowledge … wishing you and your wife ,an awesome ride together in your marriage journey.


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